Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Random Cultural Annoyances

- Sarah Palin says we need to 'incentivize' our young Americans to realize what it is in terms of benefits and service our military can offer.

If this sounds like made-up, management speak, it's because it is. The origin of this word is 1970. Yes, I know, that's thirty-eight years ago, but it's still around yesterday's corner for the English language life span. And it's an irritating trend we can't stop -- turning nouns into verbs!

I foresee that forty years from now, this might actually be a legitimate sentence:

"Like, I need to, like, groceryize, like, my house, so I'm, like, carizing over to O'Malias, but first, I need to, like, moneyize my wallet, like."

- The last group of people that you can publicly hate without being deemed insensitive are:

Smokers.

And I'm comfortable with that. The other day I was walking by some people who were smoking about 100 feet outside my building, so I held my breath as I walked through the haze, but somehow, the smoke STILL got absorbed in my nostrils. How is this possible? I know, I know. All of your libertarian instincts are coming out, and you're saying, "It's their bodies." Not when you make everything stink around me. If everybody had some type of filter that could TRULY absorb the smoke, I wouldn't care if you smoked standing next to me (though I WOULD pass legislation that you have to pay more for Medicare).

The thing that REALLY puzzles me is the number of young professionals I know who smoke. They are (a) presumably highly educated, (b) young enough to have never seen the "smoking is cool" TV ads, and (c) young enough that they heard the Surgeon General's warning before they got addicted, unlike people who started in the 1950's and 1960's who now can't quit. Bow down to peer pressure, sheeple. Ask any young professional smoker how (s)he started, and it's ALWAYS at a party or in a bar while drinking with other smokers. NOBODY's started by buying a pack to smoke alone at home.

- Why do people litter? Seriously, when did our streets become a public trashcan? It is so difficult to get to a trash can that you have to empty the contents of your entire car into the grocery store parking lot? (You KNOW who you are!)

- Speaking of grocery parking lots, are Americans lazier now? The parking lot is packed, and people cannot get parking spots because about 40 of them have carts sitting in the spots. Is it REALLY that difficult for you to return your cart to one of the cart holders?

- I'm assuming you know when you went to the grocery store that you didn't have $180 in cash, so why do you wait until all of your groceries are in plastic before you even pull out your checkbook?

Here's an idea: write out everything on your check except for the amount BEFORE you go, AND have you checkbook out with pen in hand ready to write so you can do so when you get your total. This will keep the 21 people behind you in line from all sighing in passive aggressive ways, giving you dirty looks, or worse. I was irritated, for sure, but I'm pretty mellow overall. I couldn't say the same for the people behind me. I actually feared for this woman's life.

- FYI, while I'm on the grocery store, you do NOT have 20 items of less if you have 30 each of 20 different items. That's 600 items, m'kay?!?!?!


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9 comments:

Anonymous said...

man, IPOPA, you're becoming the Andy Rooney of the Indiana blogosphere.

Don't go down that road.

Anonymous said...

I´m with you on the smokers and having to walk through their haze to pass a building and then you have the smoking stench on you...smokers have no idea that they stink!!!!!

At the Downtown Marsh/Omalias the cart return is right by the front door....most stores place them out in the lot where it is convenient to put them. Also have you noticed the lack of open checkout lanes there and then the two that are open have 20 people in them......management needs to improve staffing at that store

Anonymous said...

You do know that Senator Obama is a smoker, don't you? I suppose there are some bad habits even a Harvard degree can't overcome.

legaldiva said...

Bad day, huh?

Chris Worden said...

Andy Rooney of the blogosphere?!?! Ha ha ha!

"I WONDER . . ."

I know Obama smokes, and I'm hoping his Surgeon General will lean on him!

It's not so much a bad day as it is a sadness that we expect so little of ourselves in terms of courtesy to others. If that makes me the crotchety curmudgeon, so be it. Somebody has to appeal to our better natures because we obviously aren't doing it on our own.

Anonymous said...

There used to be indoor smoking areas in most public places and work places, usually rooms where nonsmokers didn't have to go and which contained the smoke, but the laws chased smokers outside. You probably were/are very much for the indoor smoking bans...what did you think was going to happen? Everyone smokes outside now. That is the only lawful option.

Anonymous said...

I suspect Michelle will have more influence on Obama stopping his smoking than the surgeon general although I was under the impression that he had already quit.

Anonymous said...

Me too. Meaning I though the had quit. He doesn't smell like a smoker.

Sean Shepard said...

This was awesome.

I have considered putting together a little 10-15 minute documentary using the camcorder showing lazy people leaving their carts anywhere in the parking lot, dumping their trash, parking in two spots like their car is more important than somebody elses and whatever else and then going up with a microphone and confronting them about it.

Oh the fun that could be had.