UPDATED: The Brizzi Requiem

Carl Brizzi announced he is not running for re-election. Surprised count? Zero.

Brizzi says he'll throw his weight behind his chief of staff, Helen Marchal. Good call. Wonderful lady. Her husband is Democrat Commissioner Jeff Marchal, a good guy in his own right.

Under optimal circumstances, Ms. Marchal might have a fighting chance to crawl from the wreckage and make a respectable showing. However, knowing I needed such circumstances, I'd be miffed by the following Brizzi quote were I her:

"...after serving as prosecutor for the last seven years, I have wrestled with the question of whether I could make a commitment to serve an additional five years."

You can't serve an additional five years unless you first intended to serve out the remaining one year of your current term, can you? That says to me that Brizzi is stayin' for now.

Sorry, but guilt by association is an often lethal political staple. That's why I'm skeptical Dr. Evil's number two can Febreeze off the Brizzi under any circumstance. But with him clinging to the office, it'll be impossible. You can't establish your own reputation for ethics and adept management when you're still working under the Brizzi cloud.

Were I Marchal, I'd offer to give back the Brizzi endorsement letter in exchange for his letter of resignation. (Seriously, isn't having Brizzi endorse you for prosecutor akin to having Michael Vick endorse you for ASPCA president?) Also, aren't we talking awkwardness on par with The Office? How do you navigate around the fact your campaign's biggest liability is the guy for whom you work? Yow.

Brizzi is actually pretty savvy politically, so you have to ask, "Why doesn't he go and give her a fighting chance?"

I'm beginning to wonder if we had him all wrong. Maybe it wasn't that he is loaded with Tim Durham stock-pick money. Maybe it's that, like Durham, he's completely over-leveraged. If, as one blog reported, every property he owns is encumbered by two mortgages, can you imagine him walking away from $130,000 per year without a sweet deal lined up?

Maybe his continued tenure at the City-County Building is not political arrogance or indifference, but rather the last card held by a crumbling guy with nowhere to fall: if the GOP wants him gone in time to save this election, they better get somebody on his phone with a really good offer.

UPDATE: Rough week. Sometimes I overlook the obvious, such as the necessity that Helen Marchal resign for fear of violating the Little Hatch Act. She is no longer in the office so "The Office" issues are gone.

The federal Hatch Act prohibits local employees from engaging in political activities if the entity for which they work has programs financed in whole or part by federal money. Those activities include being a candidate for a partisan office. Clearly, you cannot stop a sitting prosecutor from running for re-election, which makes Brizzi's remaining all the more troubling, doesn't it?

UPDATED: The Brizzi Requiem

Rokita Is a Devious Genious

Sometimes I suffer from political tactic envy when Republicans come up with the most amazing ploys. Today, I’m talking about my Wabash classmate, Todd Rokita.

Rokita put his poli-sci chops in full motion by starting a crusade called Rethinking Redistricting, the goal of which is to take the drawing of legislative boundaries out of the hands of the evil politicians. You know, the self-interested types deviously sketching out Rorschach legislative boundaries to confuse simple-minded Hoosiers about who our state reps and senators are.

I’ve seen Rokita’s traveling presentation, and it’s ingenious. It employs “common sense” with cunning effectiveness and is chocked full of “that’s outrageous” moments. “Why would we have the North side of a street in one district and the South side in another?” Rokita asks to collective gasps of indignation. “Why would we split a city in two?” he asks, as if we are forcing it to secede from the Union instead of giving it one more state rep to advocate for it than most cities have.

Another thing Rokita and Governor Daniels talk about is the lack of competition in legislative districts. Here’s the Guv’s quote: “Hoosiers deserve districts that make common sense and keep communities together, not lines drawn by political party computers to protect incumbents and limit competition.”

Now, as populist as this rhetoric is, we know aspiring politicos have to be at peace with their own party leadership, at least to some degree, so ask yourself this question: “How does a guy running for Governor as a Republican in 2012 avoid getting frickasseed by every R at the statehouse over this proposal? At first, Rokita did got the verbal beatdown by Senator David Long and House Minority Leader Briam Bosma. But then it stopped.

I think I know why. Rokita told them what he knew.

Follow this closely, devoted readers.

Professors Jowei Chen and Jonathan Rodden have compelling research showing that, because Democrats tend to live in urban areas, if you take “politics” out of map drawing and require compact, contiguous districts, Republicans gain electoral advantage, even without any intentional gerrymandering by Republicans.

Have you ever heard of anything as clever? How can even a wide-eyed optimist avoid morphing to a haggard cynic when the single greatest political advantage the GOP can ever have comes from saying, "Let's not make redistricting political!" The good government types and editorial boards are now shills for the Republican Party, and they don't even know it!

"But wait, Chris," you say. "Governor Daniels and Rokita talk about competitive districts and how many incumbents run unopposed."

Indeed, but among the priority hierarchy, notice that competition is the last thing mentioned. Did the Star (or anybody else) think to ask Rokita this question: "If you knew splitting a particular city would make a strong Republican-leaning district competitive, would you do it under your plan?" You already know their answer.

Initially, I was going to prove this alleged desire for competition is a sham by analyzing the maps Rokita paid to draw up. Then I learned something interesting. They aren't actual maps; they are concept maps.

I don't care what you call them, though. I challenge Rokita to produce the precincts in his map for me to analyze whether Rokita's own map increases the number of competitive districts. If he can't or won't do this, he shouldn't talk about competition because that's not his goal. Victory is.

(Sorry, Teddy, but if we were sitting around with beers in hand with no mics, cameras, or blog thoughts, you know you'd chuckle about how politically devious this is. And brilliant).

LATER THIS WEEK...the Republican Gambits for Leasing Toll Roads, Parking Meter Collection, and Property Tax Reform!!!

Rokita Is a Devious Genious

Colts Follow-Up: National Mocking!

Okay, so now the Colts are being mocked by the hillarious and satirical on-line magainze, The Onion. This is too good not to repost in full, though please check out the website for some great laughs.

Colts To Rest Starters For First Game Of Playoffs

INDIANAPOLIS—At his weekly press conference Monday, Colts head coach Jim Caldwell announced that he will rest key starters during the divisional round of the AFC playoffs to keep his players fresh for a Super Bowl run.

"You can't win the Super Bowl if you don't get there with all your players healthy," said Caldwell, who added that next Saturday quarterback

Peyton Manning would probably get the first two series, which will mostly be comprised of running plays.

"Dwight [Freeney] and Dallas [Clark] will get about a quarter in the AFC Championship game. But honestly, even if we make it to the Super Bowl, I can't see playing these guys the whole game. The 2010 season is closer than you think."

Throughout the entire press conference Manning could be seen in full uniform, stalking and pacing in the back of the room.

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Also today, Tiki Barber predicted that Baltimore would beat the Colts. I'm thinking that's pundit crazy talk, but he said two things: Baltimore's defense confuses Peyton Manning (recall his two interceptions in the 17-15 victory) AND "The Colts took their foot of the gas and lost their mojo." We'll see.

Next post is back to the politics!!!

Colts Follow-Up: National Mocking!