Can I Get Some Religious Instruction With My Diatribe?

When I was a kid, my sister and I were channel surfing through a mind-numbing range of THIRTY-SIX options from the “cable TV” my parents had just installed. (Back then, more than 6 channels was MAJOR). We halted when we saw an astronaut floating on the moon before he staked a flag into the ground. The flag changed colors repeatedly to some guitar riffs. Then some quirky little techno-pop ballad started to play:

“I heard you on the wireless back in ’52,
Lying awake intent on tuning in to you,
If I was young it didn’t stop you coming through…..
Oh-a Oh!”

It was “Video Killed the Radio Star” by the Buggles, an apropos song for the launch of MTV, which my sister and I actually saw by dumb luck. The Buggles should do a follow-up song called "Video Killed Quality Music," but the prevalance of talentless though attractive slutteens in "the biz" is a discussion for another time.

Wikipedia tells me the MTV kick-off was August 1, 1981, and it seems that the 1980s were the last time I actually SAW a music video on MTV.

Institutions, even those that are culturally iconic, often morph to "keep up with the times." But sometimes they shouldn’t. They need to stick with their “core competencies.” Puck on the Real World and the lineage of losers that followed never fascinated me like the video for “Too Shy” by Kajagoogoo. I could never figure out why the guy was wearing a raccoon skin on his head (was that his hair?!?) and why he’s shoeless. Also, why didn’t the waitress just take some Tylenol already? It was clear she had a headache.

But I digress. The same thing about “core competencies” applies to churches. Remember when they actually did sermons about the Bible? Those were the days! Now, apparently, they would rather do political screeds for their congregants. Father Michael Pfleger mocked Hillary Clinton at Barack Obama’s church, which prompted an angry response from the Catholic League.

According to CNN...

"The Catholic League is an influential non-partisan organization that says its mission is to protect the free-speech rights of Catholics 'whenever and wherever they are threatened.' The League was an early critic of the Rev. John Hagee, the controversial evangelical pastor whose endorsement was sought by John McCain but later repudiated."

(Editors Note: Even if you agree with the Catholic League, as I do, you have to admit that it's pretty funny to have a "free speech" group telling a guy to shut the hell up. Also, I have to think that working at the Catholic League must be like being a Maytag repair man. Is there really that much suppression of Catholic speech? And no, all the people yelling at Marge at the Bingo Hall to quit blabbing about the "cover all" she won last Friday doesn't count.)

Father Pfleger’s comments prompted another apology from Senator Obama who called the comments “divisive, backward-looking rhetoric, which doesn't reflect the country I see or the desire of people across America to come together in common cause."

There’s always been a fine line between showmanship and theology, but I’m not sure I’m keen on a church service being like Def Comedy Jam. But what REALLY bothers me is the blatant stupidity. Obviously, every member of the Trinity Church must now know everything that they say or do is being recorded and broadcast on Youtube. So, in the future, PLEASE stick to Moses.

Not since the Spanish Inquisition has one church so tortured a man.

Can I Get Some Religious Instruction With My Diatribe?

I Put the Whine in Weinzapfel

Crap! Democratic gubernatorial candidate Jill Long-Thompson’s best running mate just went out the window. Evansville Mayor Jonathan Weinzapfel says he will not accept the number two slot.

This is a blow to the JLT campaign. You could not have designed a better complement to a JLT candidacy. Weinzapfel is a young, attractive, bright, Southern executive in a large city he dominated in November with a staggering 85% of the vote. Moreover, job creation is a key issue in this campaign, and one of Weinzapfel’s primary duties is to “bring jobs” to Evansville.

In Weinzapfel’s statement, he noted the unfinished tasks facing Evansville, but you have to believe his decision included some handicapping.

I’ve never subscribed to the belief that you’re “finished in politics” if you lose in a supporting role. However, in this case, while all might have been forgiven had he ran and won, he'd have irritated a LOT of people who put faith in him six months ago if he ran and lost. He’d be your typical “office jumper.”

The smart play was to wait, so JW's decision shouldn't surprise anybody. After all, if JLT loses, Mayor Weinzapfel is looking at an open field in 2012. And make no mistake, Jonathan Weinzapfel IS the presumptive nominee. For what office? Anyone he wants. Any statewide office, any year. The Mayor IS the golden child of an IDP that doesn’t have many obvious superstars on its bench. JW isn't going to jump into a potential bowl of tarnish after he spent so much time building a profile statewide speaking at JJ dinners.

In addition, there is still a lingering sentiment that JLT’s campaign is an “anti-establishment” insurgency. (Of course, this sentiment is mostly shared by “the establishment”). Regardless of whether the perception is real or just…uh…a perception, Weinzapfel was, no doubt, reluctant to hitch his sail to a boat that many of the IDP brass have put out to harbor.

So who’s left? The other names most bandied about are State Representative and former prosecutor Trent Van Haaften from Mount Vernon, Representative Dennis Oxley from English, Former Speaker of the House John Gregg, and Lake County Sheriff Roy Dominguez.

Roy Dominguez would be a mistake, as would anybody from Lake County this year. The county is more fractured than ever, which is REALLY saying something about a place that made Bob Pastrick a legend. Hammond Mayor Tom McDermott was once talked about as a potential running mate, but that probably went out the window when he made Rudy Clay, the Mayor of Gary, look like an idiot on CNN over the handling of primary night election returns. McDermott will NOT be getting a Christmas card from Clay this year.

But as bad as the Clay/McDermott row was, Dominguez’s blood feud with former Lake County Sheriff John Buncich makes it look like child’s play. Buncich’s ill will toward Dominguez was most evident when Buncich orchestrated Dominguez’s ouster from the Fraternal Order of Police. I swear to God, the Lake County Sheriff got voted out of his own FOP lodge.

Here’s why that’s bad. Governor Daniels received the Firefighters endorsement earlier this week, meaning JLT badly needs the FOP on board to avoid the “public safety sweep.” But given Lake County’s juice with the state FOP, how likely is Buncich to push for the endorsement if Dominguez, his sworn enemy, is on the ticket?

Moreover, Dominguez has quite a few lawsuits pending against him for his management of the Lake County Jail. Most of them are “prisoner lawsuits,” and these tend to be inmates complaining about not having enough crunchy peanut butter and the like, but JLT needs somebody squeaky clean who isn’t embroiled in any local political flaps. For people outside of Lake County, though, there IS no squeaky clean in Lake County. Any allegation sticks.

But more importantly, JLT performed poorly in the southern part of the state. If she picks a northern running mate, it would be horrible tactically.

Indiana House Speaker John Gregg fits the bill. He’s charismatic, “Southern,” and loyal as a party solider. He’s carried more water for “up ticket” candidates than Gunga Din, and nobody pumps up a room better than the party’s de facto cheerleader-in-chief. The only downside, which, depending on his specific clients might be not all that significant, is that some of his Southern gentleman air wore off when he left the Indiana General Assembly to join the Bingham McHale's Indianapolis lobby shop. Daniels could pitch him as arguably part of the “Indianapolis power elite." That would certainly make it harder for JLT to attack the "status quo" and the "Indianapolis power brokers." And then, there's the question of whether JLT would forgive and forget, since Gregg spoke highly of Schellinger on his website.

State Representative Dennis Oxley is an intriguing pick. He has an adorable family, he’s in the leadership at the House, but his background is in education, which has not been high on the radar during this campaign. Moreover, Oxley left his job as an education administrator near his home to become a “project manager” at Beam, Longest, and Neff, LLC, an engineering firm out of Indianapolis. (As an aside, how do all these representatives who allegedly live in Southern Indiana hold these Indianapolis jobs?)

If JLT is looking at Oxley, she’ll need to do a real study of BLN projects to see whether Oxley can get “Schellingered” by Daniels in November. As you may recall, JLT attacked Jim Schellinger for allegedly “lobbying” for school projects that raised property taxes while making money for his architecture firm. If Oxley’s fingerprints can be found on any similar project, Daniels will eat him for lunch by using JLT’s own add and superimposing Oxley’s face.

This leaves Trent Van Haften. He has no obvious downsides (except for being a lawyer), but like Oxley, he is not generally known out of his house district. Moreover, his background in law enforcement won’t be a big bonus in a year when crime isn't a major issue.

In conclusion, the best running mate for JLT is a young, southern white man with a thriving business who treats his employees well and who has the independent wealth to overcome JLT's fundraising deficit.

Can anybody get Bill Cook to a time machine?

I Put the Whine in Weinzapfel

The "800 New Case Manager" Gorilla

Let’s start with a humanitarian principle that nobody (sane) will dispute:

“Children shouldn’t die.”

Now let’s add a political principle that is equally above dispute:

“If you are a politician, and your office is connected to a child’s death, even remotely, nasty headlines follow and angry citizens will want you charged with criminal offenses and inflicted with the same injuries suffered by the child.”

Yeah, none too pleasant for a public servant. And here begins your lesson in “political fecal gravity,” gentle readers. It is stated thusly:


"When the dookie hits the oscillating unit, it always trickles down."

Too many children were dying in DCS’ care, so the Governor decided he wanted to double the number of family case managers. The thinking was that each case manager had too many cases to visit enough with foster parents or biological parents who were close to reunifying with their children. As a result, corners were cut, indicators were missed, and bad things happened. Sure, it signaled a huge growth in government, but the premise seemed logical.

But here are three things you don’t know that apparently the Governor didn’t care about when he made his “Star Wars” campaign ad touting “800 New Child Protection Workers!!!”

1. There is a huge difference between having 800 new slots allocated statewide for case managers and actually HAVING 800 new case managers on the job. At the Marion County Department of Child Services, the job pressures so greatly outpace the financial rewards that to call the office a “revolving door” doesn't capture the fact many new hires jump through the glass mid-rotation.

2. The Marion County Department of Child Services has just increased its caseloads substantially. When a hospital, daycare, school, or good guy citizen calls CPS to report potential abuse or neglect, that call generates what is called a “310 report.” CPS then decides whether to investigate the allegation or to "screen it out.”


If someone, for example, reports, “My next door neighbor’s kid watches The Simpsons eight hours a day,” it might be suspect parenting, but it doesn’t mean Mr. State gets to kick down their door. These calls get screened out, along with questionable allegations made during child custody disputes.

For reasons that are unclear, until about a month ago, the Marion County DCS office screened out 40% of all 310 reports. Now, with the creation of a new 310 review team, that percent is down to 20% screened out, which is consistent with the state average for other counties.

What does this mean? A lot more CHINS (Child in Need of Services) cases and more kids taken from their parents. Right now, Marion County DCS is filing 50 new CHINS cases filed per week.

In some respects, this is expected. Supply creates its own demand, as new workers and entities seek to justify their own employment existence. Talk to any lawyer who practices at the juvenile court, and they will all tell you that as soon as a special “domestic violence” unit was created at Marion County DCS about six months ago, the number of domestic violence cases filed as CHINS actions increased noticeably.

Instinctively, you might say, “Hey, isn’t it good to investigate MORE?” Sure, but it has to make you curious about the initial premise justifying the expansion of government, doesn’t it? If we say we want to increase case managers to decrease average caseloads, but then we increase caseloads without adding (and more importantly, without actually KEEPING) more case managers, how do we hit our target?

This leads me to the third point.

3. When we added these new case managers, why didn’t the Governor also come up with additional money to pay for more court Magistrates, DCS attorneys and public defenders, DCS supervisors (somebody has to get promoted to train the newbies), additional court space, foster placement per diems and foster parent training?


The Governor is not stupid, so how could he have assumed that adding new case managers wouldn't have a ripple effect throughout the rest of the system. Wouldn't that be like doubling your police force while thinking you wouldn't need more courts, prosecutors, public defenders, and jail space?

If there is any benefit to the fact DCS has not actually reached 800 new case manager, it's found in the delay of enacting human nature. If you have somebody in a "policing" role, they ARE going to make more arrests, even if now you're enforcing smaller offenses. I promise you that if we quadruple IMPD's workforce, we'd all be getting tickets for driving 56 in a 55. Once DCS actually gets to its "fighting weight," I predict you will see more people coming in the system ever before, and they'll stay in it longer as well.


What makes increased caseloads terrifying from a taxpayer perspective is that each new case increases the already insane amounts we pay for the stuff we make parents do to get their kids back, including drug testing, drug and alcohol rehabilitation classes, parenting classes, anger management classes, domestic violence classes, individual and family counseling, home-based counseling, and supervised visitation. I promise you, ladies and gentlemen, unless we revolutionize how we do things in the Marion County child welfare system, these costs will ALL go through the roof.

That means the next time you want to complain about your property taxes, look at your child welfare budget, and thank the Governor for crushing your wallet.

Some things are worth it. Is this one of them?


Stay tuned for Part Deux (a/k/a “Who Will Save the Children?”)

The "800 New Case Manager" Gorilla