Friday, November 20, 2009

Friday Local News Mashup! Dogs, Gods, and Odds

Today is an overwhelming news day locally, so here are the highlights….

Safety NOT in These Numbers!

How can anyone feel safer in Indianapolis now than two years ago? Masked gunmen robbed the downtown Dunkin’ Donuts this morning. (Learn to spell, oh, purveyor of greasy delights! It’s “doughnuts.”). A Village Pantry got hit a bit later, and we just added a homicide to our annual count. For the past two months, the city has suffered from a barrage of violent crime unlike anything I've seen in quite some time.

Dog-Killer, the Bounty Hunt

In South Bend, residents pooled together $1,000 as a reward for information about a home robber who shot and killed a three-legged dog who lost the limb to bone cancer. Only a sick puppy would kill a sick puppy, and I’d like to deposit this guy in a small closet with some Pit Bulls.

But I’m always intrigued at the heightened level of outrage over animal cruelty. Gina Oliver says that the robbers “crossed a line that no one should ever cross.” Surely, Gina Oliver knows of people who have been murdered in South Bend. Has she ever established a reward fund for the information about those murderers?

This story made me think of what D.L. Hughley said shortly after Michael Vick's arrest:

"White people love their dogs, boy. Michael Vick is gonna get the death penalty. Right now, O.J. Simpson is off somewhere thinking, "Man, I'm sure glad I didn't kill the dog, too.' "

Is there anybody who thinks that there are many human murder victims whose deaths prompt less outrage? What’s your take on this? Is it because people believe other people have a fighting chance and dogs don’t? What about if the dog that gets shot is a Doberman? What prompts so many to feel more sympathy for man’s best friend than for man?

Terre Haute Baptists "Go Negative" on Islam

A Baptist Church in Terre Haute (which the French translate as "high ground" but West Hautians translate as "terrible hole") posted the message "Jesus rose and died for your sins. What did Allah do?"

Now here's the insane part. Pastor Bob Parker said the sign wasn't meant to be derogatory to Islam. Does anybody believe this was posed on the little church board as an insightful, comparative religion question?!? Tsk, tsk, Pastor Bob. Last time I checked, lying was a sin.

This story reminded me of the late George Carlin's take on claims of religious superiority:

...if you read history, you realise that God is one of the leading causes of death. Hindus, Muslims, Jews, Christians all taking turns killing each other 'cuz God told them it was a good idea. The sword of God, the blood of the land, veangence is mine. Millions of dead (m.f.) all because they gave the wrong answer to the God question. 'You believe in God?' 'No.' BLAM! Dead. 'You believe in God?' 'Yes.' 'You believe in my God? 'No.' BLAM! Dead.

'My God has a bigger (expletive) than your God!'

Next Time Pay the Freakin’ Ticket

What the hell was he thinking? We don’t know.

Instead of paying a ticket for illegally parking his bike, a Purdue University student thought it would be funny to put the ticket, a bike lock, and a $20 bill in a box and leave it under suspicious circumstances in the Vistor’s Center.

Guess the joke is on him. The bomb squad had to scan the package, and now the student is being accused of “terrorist mischief,” a C felony. If you don’t know by now that Americans don’t play around with terrorism, you’re basically an imbecilic gluteus maximum.

Oxley Hospitalized

Indiana State Representative Dennis Oxley, Sr., is in critical condition with an “undisclosed illness.” The Star says nobody knows any more than that. Our prayers go out to Representative Oxley and his family.


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1 comment:

Eclecticvibe said...

We have a whole division of government to catch and kill dogs every day. What Vick did was wrong and is reprehensible. Animal control is just as bad. There's a problem with humane treatment in both cases. The government (animal control) just gets away with it.